Six years ago...
I still remember that anxious and unsettling feeling of emerging out in the world and being around strangers after being continuously cooped up at home for so long! This might be how hermits become hermits -- you just get used to living a certain way and it is uncomfortable to overcome it. Glad us and the world persevered and overcame the Covid shutdown.
Today marks day 71 that we have been "stay at home". I could probably count on two hands the total number of times I've been out of the house (other than daily time outside around the neighborhood or hikes nearby). Nearly all my time is spent inside the same 2400 square feet. While I am incredibly grateful for this comfortable, all-I-need space, I have become accustomed to this new way of living, and it's now weird when I go out these days...
I remember driving for the first time after not driving or even being in a car for like 2 weeks. It was as if I had regressed and felt awkward and not sure what to do. My normal driving reflexes felt off.
I remember walking into a store for the first time and being annoyed at the other people for being in my way or being too close or breathing in my direction. I was so anxious and felt like I needed to focus on my survival that I forgot how to smile at strangers.
I remember meeting up with friends for the first time after not seeing anyone in weeks and feeling a bit weird about being around other people that I would not normally feel weird around!
For the first 2 months it was comfortable and safe being in our little space, doing our own activities not getting anyone's germs and not giving anyone our germs -- maximizing time doing all the things I didn't normally have time for. But now as I reflect back as well as look forward to being back in the "outside world", I think this is a little bit like criminals that become institutionalized! Day in and day out, my world had became so small, it made the thought of venturing out a bit intimidating.
However, for the last week we have gradually started doing more and more activities outside our house, albeit most have still been "outside" -- like eating on a patio at a restaurant and having a pool party with friends.
The sudden isolation at home, brought on many changes. I think the gradual return to regular activities around other people will take a little time getting used to again!
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